The Soda Incident
by Chiisai-tori
Summary: Warning: Soda is hazardous to your health. As Kagome and Miroku are about to find out!


A/N: Well, whaddaya know? I wrote something without a trace of angst in sight! It's a oneshot, a fluffy little ficlet, no warnings necessary at all. And as for pairings…a decidedly M/K flavour.

And...I know. It's not TWIHTB. Sorry. But Chapter 3 is coming. Promise!

Disclaimer: I hereby disclaim any ownership of this anime or its characters…wonderful though they may be!

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The Soda Incident

By Chiisai-tori

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Kagome sighed contentedly, looking around from her spot on the grass. "Isn't it a beautiful day?" She tilted her head back to let the sun warm her face.

Privately, Miroku agreed wholeheartedly – but he wasn't necessarily talking about the weather! "You say that every time you return from your era, Kagome-sama," the houshi pointed out calmly.

She frowned at him, then smiled brilliantly. "Well, it doesn't make it any less true! It _is_ a beautiful day." And so it was. The air was cool but clear, and a light wind was moving gently through the trees around them. It was the kind of scene you capture on postcards and send to your friends saying "Wish you were here" when what you really meant was something more like "Eat your hearts out, suckers!"

Off to the side, Inuyasha growled. "Yeah, a _beautiful_ day for youkai to be out and about! We're not getting anything done by lazing around, wench!"

Kagome suddenly leaned over and punched him lightly in the arm, earning herself an annoyed scowl. "Oh, lighten up, puppy! Even youkai have to rest _sometime_, don't they?"

"No," he grumbled unconvincingly.

Sango let out an amused chuckle, shaking her head. "I would give up now, Inuyasha. You haven't got a chance," she advised cheerfully. The result was predictable.

"Feh!"

"Bye, Inuyasha!" Shippo called, waving. The hanyou just grunted and continued stomping off to sulk. Of course, he would never admit that this was what he was doing – but the rest of the group allowed him his little fantasy that he had them fooled. "Idiot," Sango muttered. She was just settling herself down for a rest when she abruptly jerked upright again. "Kirara!"

"Huh?" three confused voices let out in chorus.

"Kirara! She's gone off somewhere, I can't see her around."

Shippo yawned. "She's a big kitty, she'll be just fine."

Sango rolled her eyes at the little kitsune. 'Brat.' She got to her feet in a rush, causing her comrades to blink stupidly up at her. "Well then, why don't _you_ come along and try to find a cat who doesn't want to be found?" She grabbed him by the arm and yanked him up into the air, ignoring his startled "Eep!"

"Sango-chan," Kagome began worriedly. A frantic voice cut her off.

"Aiee! Okay, I give, I give! Just…stop waving me around…" Shippo pleaded anxiously, looking a little green.

Kagome listened as Sango lectured the youkai whilst striding over to a thick patch of trees and shrubbery. "I know perfectly well that she's a 'big kitty', as you put it. But think about it – if we can't find her soon, then you'll be _walking_ for the rest of the day until she catches up to us in her own time. You like that idea?" Shippo shook his head, suitably cowed. "Good. Then you won't mind floating up there to have a look in the branches? She likes to climb."

The girl from the future watched her friends disappear into the woods. "I had no idea that finding Kirara could be so difficult. Although I guess I should have guessed something like that. It's what cats do ,after all."

Miroku grinned slightly. "I rather think Sango-chan was overstating the problem, Kagome-sama. It can't be that much of an effort, surely."

Kagome brushed her bangs out of her eyes before turning to face her one remaining conversation partner. "You'd be surprised, Miroku-sama. Cats can hide in the most unusual places, and can't be found for hours if they don't want to be. I mean, Buyo looks like the laziest, fattest slob of a pussy cat for miles around, but good luck finding him when he wants to disappear. He's turned up in the weirdest places! The attic, the Goshinboku, the well, under the bed…you wouldn't think a cat his size could fit in some places, but he does! It's uncanny, really."

Miroku listened to her little spiel with half an ear, more interested in the fact that the pair had been left alone – and Kagome was looking so very adorable right now with her bright eyes and slightly pink cheeks and hair waving in the breeze. After a minute or so, Kagome narrowed her eyes at him. "You're not listening."

"Oh, yes I am!" he hurried to assure her. "Fascinating!"

"Hmpf," was the only answer he got. 'He looks so cute when he knows he's slipped up,' Kagome mused secretly. 'But he doesn't need to know that…goodness knows, that ego of his is big enough already!'

Miroku decided that a change of subject was in order. "So, what shall we do now, Kagome-sama? All of our usual companions seem to have abandoned us!"

She chuckled. "Hmm, I don't know." Reaching over the the bag lying on the ground, she fished around until she found a can of soda. "Thirsty?" The houshi declined (politely, of course!) and she settled back down comfortably. "Not much to do…cloud-gazing?"

"Ah-"

"Eh, probably not." She took a swig of her drink, trying not to laugh. "You'd only see women in the clouds, which makes it kind of pointless."

Miroku couldn't decide whether he was pleased or insulted. The fact that it was quite accurate was neither here nor there. Settling on a sort of 'half-smirk', he shifted a little closer to the girl. "Kagome-sama?" he practically purred.

"Hm?" She took another gulp of her drink.

"We could always do _something else_ to pass the time." The voice was low, suggestive, and decidedly dangerous.

Kagome blinked at him, sensing something was a little off. "Like what?" Another gulp of soda.

He smiled widely. "Why gaze at women in the clouds when the real thing is right next to me?"

Kagome's eyes widened, staring at him in shock. Then, to his consternation, she gave a little start and began flapping her hands around frantically. Tears sprang up in her eyes, spilling down her cheeks. Miroku grabbed her by the shoulders worriedly, checking to see that she was alright. He had certainly never quite gotten a reaction like this before! "Gods, Kagome-sama, it wasn't _that_ bad a suggestion, surely?!" Finally Kagome gave a choked cough and started gasping for breath.

"_Fizzy_! Egh, that was mean! I had a mouthful of soda, you moron! Man, that stuff kills when it goes down the wrong way!" Miroku couldn't help it; he had to laugh. "Oh, sure, it's sooo funny. Hmpf!" She crossed her arms in a huff.

Miroku got a hold of himself and touched her arm lightly in apology. "Forgive me, Kagome-sama, but I have never seen someone act in quite so strange a manner." He eyed the can in her hand distrustfully. "I didn't realize that this drink of yours was so…hazardous."

"Only if you inhale it by accident instead of swallowing," Kagome explained. "It's the bubbles, you see – if the stuff goes down the wrong pipe, it feels like your head's been blown off or something. You cough, and your eyes water, and your nose gets all tingly, and it's just…really uncomfortable."

"I see," he murmured quietly. This sounded promising! The day had been somewhat boring, anyway. He waited, timing his move carefully. She took a cautious sip…

"Has Inuyasha kissed you yet?"

Kagome choked, spraying soda everywhere. "Wha-what?!"

Miroku wiped the sticky droplets off of his face, looking mildly disgusted. "Has he kissed you? It's a simple question, Kagome-sama. Yes or no?"

Kagome blushed madly. "No!" She blinked rapidly, trying to get rid of the tears in her eyes. 'Miroku is right…my drink is hazardous…'

Miroku smiled wickedly. "Then he won't mind if I do this?" He leant over and kissed her cheek. Kagome stiffened. What was that…?

"Eww! You licked me!" she squeaked nervously. Nervous, because…he wasn't moving away.

"I'm merely getting this soda off of your pretty face, Kagome-sama. You wouldn't want to be all sticky, would you?" he muttered distractedly. He pressed his lips to the corner of her mouth softly, once more licking up the bubbly liquid.

"Uhn…" was the intelligent reply. Miroku drew back slightly, his eyes fastening on the pink lips just in front of him. "_Kagome_," he breathed…

"Houshi-sama! Get away from her, you blithering idiot!" Sango's voice cut through the rather comfortable silence like a knife. Miroku jumped as though stung. He saw Kagome's eyes staring at him in a strange mix of confusion and disappointment. What to make of that?

He had no idea, to be honest.

"There is no need to be so upset, Sango-chan. I was merely assisting Kagome-sama with getting rid of some spilt soda, nothing more," he said easily, schooling his features into a neutral expression. It didn't save him.

"Pervert!" He closed his eyes, waiting for the coming slap. Or punch. Or kick. Nothing? He opened his eyes to see Kagome being led away by her rather overprotective friend.

'Hey…bring her back! I wasn't finished…' He quickly squashed that thought.

"_You_, Houshi-sama, are walking the rest of the way. Shippo! Kirara!"

"Coming!" the kitsune's voice called. A few moments later, Miroku watched the large cat disappear into the sky, his hand shading his eyes. A low growl at his side startled him out of his thoughts. "Bouzu."

"Ack! Inuyasha, don't do that! A heart attack is not high on my list of things to do!"

"Yeah, but walking is. Get moving, we can't let the girls get too far ahead. Who knows what kind of stupid things they'll do?"

When your safety is in doubt, nod. A rule to live by. "Absolutely, Inuyasha. Let's go." They walked (quickly) in silence. "Ano…Inuyasha?"

"What is it now?"

"Have you ever had that 'soda' that Kagome brings sometimes?"

Inuyasha blinked, then winced in remembrance. "Yes. Damn stuff hurts my nose."

Miroku grinned. "Apparently it's rather…hazardous." But in a good way, in his mind.

A very good way. In fact, he couldn't wait to try it. With Kagome. Alone, preferably. His mind wandered happily as they moved along, making his eyes glaze over.

Mmm. Definitely alone.

* * *

There it is. My attempt at breaking my writer's block. Ja, ne!

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